How To Help Your Baby Or Toddler Adjust To Daycare
If your baby or toddler is heading to daycare soon, and you want to help them navigate this change, then I am here to help!
Sending your little one to daycare can be scary because it is not only a big change for them but also for you as a parent.
I am going to give you all the tools you need to help prepare your child for daycare and the questions to ask your daycare provider.
The first thing to do is talk to your daycare provider:
Every provider will be different in their approach, depending on where you are located and if your child is going to a home daycare or a center.
Ask your daycare provider when they offer their nap or naps. It is best to know when they will be offering nap(s) for your child so you can adjust your schedule to meet theirs. This will make it easier for your child to adjust and sleep better at daycare.
Ask them what the sleeping environment looks like. See if they use a pack’n play, a crib or a cot on the ground. You can also ask if the room is dark and if they use a sound machine to help them sleep. You might also want to ask if there is a separate room for sleeping as sometimes it is in the same room that they play in.
Ask the daycare provider how they get their babies or toddlers to sleep. It may be that they will rock your baby to sleep, sit beside them or close-by until they fall asleep or that they fall asleep independently.
A good question to ask is if they are allowed to bring comfort items from home to sleep with. Some daycares have a policy on this.
Make sure to ask all the questions you have concerns about before or even while your child is going to daycare.
How to best prepare your child for daycare:
1.Get your child on the same schedule as daycare, this may even mean dropping a nap. Give your child 2-3 weeks to adjust prior to going to daycare so it doesn’t seem as big of a jump. They get more overtired and overstimulated at daycare so it's best to give them time to adjust to the new schedule prior to sending them. This may mean adjusting wake up time or nap time(s) and bedtime.
Check out my blog on the transition from 3 naps to 2 naps
Check out my blog on the transition from 2 naps to 1 nap
2. If you are nursing to sleep then I would suggest moving to rocking to sleep or sleep training to learn independent skills. This will make the adjustment to daycare go more smoothly. Check out my blog on how to move away from nursing to sleep.
3. If your baby or toddler hasn’t taken a bottle before, I would suggest finding a way to offer breast milk, homomilk or alternative milk. If they are under 18 months, you can try getting them to take a bottle but if you have never used a bottle, they may struggle to take one. You can instead offer a sippy cup or straw cup to give your baby their milk. Practicing this at home, getting dad or a family member to help offer it can make this transition easier as well.
4. Practice getting someone else to put your baby or toddler to bed. This will help your baby to get used to others doing a routine and placing them down for sleep.
5. See if your daycare offers half days or get a family member or babysitter to come watch your baby or toddler to help them adjust before full days. If your baby has only been watched by their parents, it is a good idea to give them time to adjust before jumping into a full day and napping without you. You can go with your child the first time to see the daycare, or leave them for 1-2 hours to give them some time to adjust. If your daycare doesn’t offer this, you can do this with a babysitter, or even a family member. Helping expose them to this change and being around other caregivers can be very helpful if they haven’t experienced this before.
6. If they are over the age of 12 months you can now offer them a stuffy/lovey/small breathable blanket to sleep with. I would recommend playing with this comfort item during the day, holding it during their bedtime routine and placing it in their hand when you put them down for a nap or bedtime. This will help them to grow a bit of an attachment to this item before going to daycare.
Hold this item in your shirt, or sleep with it prior so that it smells like you. This helps them to feel more secure and comfortable when they are sleeping or are away from you.
7. Work on any separation anxiety that they may be experiencing. When you drop them off at daycare make sure to ALWAYS say goodbye, and don’t “sneak” away. Let them know you will come back later. Depending on their age you can get more specific with the details. When you come to pick them up you remind them how you always come back and give them a big hug. If your child is having a hard time with you leaving, you can ask them to wave good-bye out the window, that can sometimes help for them to see you leave in the car.
Check out my free Regression Guide that talks more about separation anxiety
Tips for when your child is at daycare:
1.Know that your child is going to be more stimulated and tired from daycare. Even if they nap well at daycare, they will be more tired at bedtime from the busy day, especially the first week or so. I would move up bedtime by 10-15 minutes based on their tired cues and how they slept the night before.
2. It is common to take 1-2 weeks to adjust to change, especially when it comes to daycare. Most babies and toddlers are not used to sleeping near other children and it may even be a whole new environment for them. So expect naps to not be perfect, and for them to most likely be shorter. In these times, I would suggest putting them down for bed 15-60 minutes earlier than they are used to, getting up to 13 hours of overnight sleep. This will help them to catch up on missed sleep during the day, and to prevent them from getting overtired the next day, leading to another bad nap. If your child is really struggling and the nap is very short and you aren’t able to move bedtime up, or if even with moving up bedtime the wake window is still too long, then I would suggest doing a bridge nap. This is a 10-20 minute nap as soon as you get them from daycare. This can be in the car or as soon as you get home. This very short nap helps to bridge the gap until their normal bedtime, and helps prevent them from getting as overtired. This nap has to be 20 minutes or under or it will affect their sleep pressure at bedtime or push bedtime late.
3. Separation anxiety can be triggered with this change, just like it can with a regression. Read my free regression guide about how to work on separation anxiety at home, and how to work on this when you get home from daycare. If your child is 18 months or older and you are struggling with bedtime battles, anxiety, fears or push back, then my bedtime battles guide is exactly what you need to help.
4. Remember that this is probably harder on you than it is your child. This is a big change for both of you, but they will have fun at daycare and will adjust to this change.
If you feel like you are struggling or would like to talk about this change in more detail and figure out a nap transition or what to do then we can set up a 30 or 60 minute call to talk all about it! I would LOVE to help!